NGood morning, it's Monday, six oh one, and the internet's best story is a dog training his own replacement.
JNot just any dog. A St. Bernard named Baloo, and he's teaching a puppy to do his job.
NDexerto posted on X that Baloo has been Siena's mascot for nearly five years.
JThe puppy is literally called Baby Baloo. I need a moment.
NYou can have a moment. Small correction: the post says Siena University. It's Siena College, upstate New York.
JFine. Baloo is a giant breed getting older, and the school wants him to enjoy retirement.
NSiena College is a private school in Loudonville, New York.
JI didn't ask for the brochure, but okay.
NHis handler, Charles Rice, says the puppy is, quote, "literally just following suit with whatever he sees Baloo doing."
JThat's the best part. The puppy learns game-day noise, crowds, everything by copying the old dog.
NWait, live animal or a person in a suit?
JLive St. Bernard. The school uses a real live mascot.
NThat makes the training plan even more interesting.
JThe puppy is basically shadowing Baloo, like an intern with better instincts.
NIf my intern copied everything I did, I'd need HR.
JFor a dog, it's a solid onboarding plan.
NThey introduced the puppy at the Blessing of the Animals during Family Weekend in early October.
JSo they didn't just drop a puppy into a stadium. They had Baloo there as the mentor.
NRight. Rice told CBS six Albany that Baloo has done a great job over the last six years.
JAnd now the goal is for Baloo to live a happy life. That's the whole story.
NThe handoff is planned for May twenty twenty-seven, when Baby Baloo takes over.
JAfter retirement, Baloo moves in with the college president and his wife. On campus.
NSo he retires without actually leaving.
JExactly. A St. Bernard with a golden parachute, but fluffy.
NBaloo has better retirement housing than most of us.
JLet's not make this about our own retirement plans.
NToo late, I'm already resentful.
JI like that a private college's mascot story is the feel-good item this morning.
NIt's simple, it's true, and it actually makes sense.
JFine, I'll say it: we needed this one.
NNow, from a good dog to a messy crypto rumor.
JSpeaking of loyalty, one crypto account on X is trying to drag SpaceX into a fight.
NBig Jiggy posted that CZ—the former Binance CEO—called out Elon and brought up Binance's SpaceX holdings.
JThe claim: those holdings are worth more than a billion dollars.
NNot official. No confirmation yet, and the post cuts off before the clarification.
JThe backstory is that CZ isn't just a random account. Binance has put money into Musk projects before.
NRight. That part is real. The new part is a billion-dollar SpaceX stake.
JSo a former crypto boss may or may not be flexing that position after a disagreement.
NThat's the honest version. The post has more question marks than answers.
JWhich makes it great for engagement, terrible for clarity.
NThat's exactly why it's only a rumor until someone posts an official response.
JIf CZ wants to make news, he'll have to finish the sentence.
NWe'll keep an eye on it, but the dog is still the only confirmed story this morning.
JTypical internet. Good boy, and a maybe.
NMore when something actually exists.